And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Randomize
