If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
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