That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
drinking out of a sandbucket again
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
