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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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