Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
40s are totally the cure
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
