i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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