Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
