Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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