i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.