If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
