I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Randomize
