i was rollin on her like bob the builder
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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