Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
He did a backflip because drugs
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