Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.