a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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