I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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