Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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