I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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