i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
