Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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