How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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