Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
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