The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
