I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
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