The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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