Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
