Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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