He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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