In the future we'll all be gay
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
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