Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize