i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
