have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
