I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
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I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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