Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
