woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
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why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
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We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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