are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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