I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
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