All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
