my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
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Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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