Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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