We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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