White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
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someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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