sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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