Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize