we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
