Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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