make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
