Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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