I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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