whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
